Empowered to say no

Empowered to say no

Many people ask me to make things for them or for others and I politely tell them no. It’s not that I don’t enjoy making things, I do. There are at least six WIPs (works in progress) at tucked away in various places. I love having dozens of items to donate to people in need, but I like to make the items on my terms. After a long challenging day at work or even during my lunch break, I like to be able to have something calming and relaxing to do. When I finish, I finish. Crocheting is not as much fun if there is a deadline involved. I can count on one hand the number of times that I have sold things that I have made – a scarf for a friend’s mother. A lady from church asked me to make baby dresses for her twin granddaughters and gave me money for materials and labor, and a friend gave me money to make a hat for her pet. That’s it. A couple of people ask me to make things for them and offer to pay but I refused because they were definitely crochet worthy.

There was a time when I didn’t crochet in public alone because I didn’t want to talk to people, never mind that I had no problem going to my knitting group and sometimes being the only crocheter, I was fine with that because there is safety in numbers.  Many times, if you are alone, “in the wild” people will ask – how much do you charge for an item.

I have found many creative ways to respond to the question: “Would you make me a….?” or with the follow up… “I’ll buy the materials.” Sometimes people are asking me to make them something because they think they can get the item cheaper especially if they are only offering to buy the materials, though when they find out how much yarn costs for the item they want, not even considering the cost of my labor they are uninterested. I am not interested either because the time that it takes to make a scarf with a moderate pattern, such as basketweave, posts or shells and my hourly wage, the scarf would start at roughly $125 with materials.

Instead I prefer to say no and just make things on my own terms. “Oh, I prefer to make things to give away,” or “I have so many groups that I am committed to making things for, that I don’t have time to make anything for you right now. Maybe in a few months,” or just politely smile and laugh as if you thought it was a joke. Sometimes I just ignore them, especially if the request isn’t made face to face. There are times when people who can craft want you to make them something, in those cases, I offer to teach them.

Yes, I could sell what I make. I don’t want to. For certain people I know that they are crochet worthy and will appreciate what I give them and they might even ask for another item. Crocheting as a process is a hobby and also philanthropy for me. I want to do it, being hired by another person to make something for them for money, sucks the joy out of crocheting. Sometimes it’s the challenge of making an item – such as a hat a former Sunday school student asked me to make or a friend who asked me to make a hat for her pet. Other times, Its’ what I would like someone to have.
It’s empowering to say no to people, especially when you want to practice your hobby for fun.

Say no, when someone asks you how much you would charge for a baby blanket. Say no when someone asks you how much it would cost for a hat or a scarf or a sweater or a throw. No one is stopping you. Take control of your craft! If you want to sell what you make or have someone purchase the materials, do it. If you don’t want to sell what you make do that too. No one makes the rules, you are empowered to say no. Say no to giving your things away without being appreciated if you don’t want to; say no to selling anything if you don’t want to… craft how you like and enjoy your hobby!

Happy crocheting!

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